Sunday, November 1, 2009

Beware: the narcissistic sociopath

I'm interested in what makes people tick and as a writer, I think I need to understand what makes people tick.

Although, I must admit, certain characters are hard to define. I'm referring to the outwardly charming, narcissistic sociopath.

Unfortunately, my daughter Rene married one. (She writes about her continuing nightmare in Jesus Loves Me But The Christians Tried To Kill Me: Memoirs From A Jezebel.

I wish she could have avoided the man she calls AntiChrist, but at least she's blogging about her experience, warning and entertaining others in the process.

However, I'm thinking I need to post some red flags that say look out for this sicko. Be warned the narcissistic sociopath can ruin your life.

With that in mind, I came across this quiz. If you answer yes to most of the questions below, run, run run away, end the relationship NOW. The narcissistic sociopath will NEVER change.

1. Does he or she act out in verbally aggressive behaviors, or does he or she have 'rages', especially if he or she feels insulted in some way? Does he or she blame 'you' or accuse you of being the one that is 'acting out' or 'out-of-control'?

2. In the beginning was he or she just 'too good to be true'?

3. Does he or she rely on you financially, or does he or she ask you to help fund things?

4. Does he or she often spend outside of the budget?

5. Is everything always about him or her and nothing ever about you? Does he or she seem insensitive to your needs, unappreciative of your input, or non-acknowledging of your accomplishments? Does he or she not recognize your giving, kindness, and thoughtfulness? Does he or she seem genuinely not interested in your life?

6. Is he or she controlling? Do you often feel manipulated?

7. Does he or she show one side (Dr. Jekyll) to the public (a perfected persona which you know is fake), and another side (Mr. Hyde) to you in private? Does he or she go out of the way to impress people?

8. Does his or her ego bruise easily, or is he or she hyper-vigilant to the slightest insult? Do you have to be careful how you word things or voice grievances?

9. Does he or she expect special treatment or feel 'entitled' to it?

10. Does he or she talk about himself or herself more than you feel is normal?

11. Does he or she avoid eye contact with you, or does he or she withhold sex or affection? Has he or she been unfaithful?

12. Does he or she seem to lack empathy or compassion for others, or does he or she 'fake' it to enhance 'public persona'?

13. Do you feel emotionally battered and confused?

14. Have you noticed your confidence or self-esteem slipping?

15. Is he or she histrionic? In other words, in public does he or she hog the limelight, putting on exaggerated shows and telling fascinating stories in order to be the center of attraction?

16. Is he or she loud or does he or she become center stage when engaging in simple conversations with other people?


  1. I have been there for sure...i should post this as one of my intros...its very valuable

  2. My posting on the narcissitic sociopath received more visitors than any of my other posts, which I thought was interesting.


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